The Wedding (Episode 709)
First Aired: Sunday, 11th December, 2005
Writer: Josh Singer
Director: Max Mayer

Killer Game Of Boggle
Santos-McGarry Campaign, The Westin hotel, Philadelphia. Donna enters a War Room as Josh and Lou finish up a quick discussion about dark states, contested races and tracking numbers.

DONNA: (on phone) ... Right ... and we'll get local press from South Jersey and the Philly suburbs? ... Great. Thanks, Edie. (she hangs up)
JOSH: Did you get the photo op with the governor?
DONNA: Santos, Baker and a cheesesteak.
JOSH: Make it a hoagie.
DONNA: Advance said he should go with a cheesesteak.
JOSH: Trust me, make it a hoagie.
DONNA: Press is a little antsy.
JOSH: Yeah, tell them national polls are meaningless.
DONNA: Staff's a little antsy, too.
JOSH: Yeah.
DONNA: You guys have been behind closed doors since we got to Philly.
JOSH: Killer game of Boggle.
DONNA: Since we got to Philly.
JOSH: Donna.
DONNA: There's a rumour we're pulling out of Arizona.
JOSH: Okay, I need you to kill that rumour.
DONNA: Is that because we're moving money into Illinois?
LOU: Josh? Joshua? We just picked up five points in Illinois.

I Believe His Exact Words Were "Pansy Ass"
Santos-McGarry Campaign Headquarters / Santos-McGarry Campaign, The Westin hotel, Philadelphia. Donna (in Philly) calls Josh (at HQ) on speakerphone to discuss Illinois and ... Whiz.

JOSH: (answers phone) Yeah?
DONNA: Tomorrow's photo op?
JOSH: Yeah?
DONNA: The governor's office said Baker would be having a cheesesteak?
JOSH: Okay ...
DONNA: Howard in Advance is worried about the comparative visual.
JOSH: They think the hoagie's going to look weak?
DONNA: I believe his exact words were "pansy ass".
JOSH: Howard's from Philly, right?
DONNA: Uh-huh.
JOSH: Okay, go with the cheesesteak.
DONNA: Yeah.
JOSH: But, uh, prep him on how to order it--no swiss, no muenster. He gets it with sauce and Whiz.
DONNA: (grinning) Whiz?
JOSH: Cheez Whiz--ask Howard. And, uh, no onions. He's got a photo op with the President at the wedding--I don't want him knocking him over with his breath.
DONNA: Got it. (to staffers) Thanks, guys. (Bram and another staffer greet her as they leave; Donna sighs and picks up the phone to speak with Josh privately) I'm getting calls about Illinois.
JOSH: Well, tell them we're excited.
DONNA: The press is wondering who decided not to contest the state.
JOSH: Tell them I did. Tell them I also made the decision not to contest Georgia, where we're down by eleven, and not to contest Mississippi, where we're down by fifteen.
LOU: You ready?
JOSH: Yeah. (to Donna) I gotta go.
(he hangs up, and Donna, looking anxious, hangs up, too)

Acts Like A Man, Eats Like A Man
Outdoor restaurant terrace / Santos-McGarry campaign airplane. Another call from Donna (in the air) to Josh (at brunch), and again, the subject of Whiz comes up.

JOSH: Hey, how was Philly?
DONNA: Pretty good ... pretty good.
JOSH: Did you get the photo op?
DONNA: Yeah, we got it. Little problem with the cheesesteak, though.
JOSH: He screwed up the order?
DONNA: Sauce and Whiz, no onions.
JOSH: That sounds fine.
DONNA: The ... Whiz got a little drippy.
JOSH: How drippy?
(behind Donna, Santos changes out of his Whiz-stained shirt)
DONNA: He probably should have ordered the hoagie.
JOSH: Who was at the photo op?
DONNA: AP ... Reuters ... The Times ... Le Monde ... we figure it's probably front page of the Philadelphia Inquirer. Is there any way you'd like me to spin it? "Acts like a man, eats like a man"?
(in the background, Josh notices the congressman he was just speaking with prior to Donna's call in an intense discussion with a senator)
JOSH: Yeah--I gotta go.

I'm An Attractive Woman Waiting To Be Entertained
White House staircase. Donna descends with a plate of food to the landing, where Josh sits, deep in thought, staring at a piece of paper with the electoral map on it.

DONNA: Fried wonton?
JOSH: Hey.
DONNA: (sits beside him) Really, they're pretty good.
JOSH: Yeah.
DONNA: They're out of champagne, though. The First Lady just gave me twenty bucks, asked me to pick up a bottle of cold Duck.
(she leans in over Josh's shoulder to see what he is so engrossed in, then leans back against the wall)
JOSH: Uh-huh.
DONNA: Josh ...
JOSH: (glances back at her) I'm sorry ... have you seen Leo?
DONNA: I'm bored. I'm an attractive woman waiting to be entertained.
JOSH: He was just with the President. (stands up) I'm sure he's still--
DONNA: I just saw him headed towards the East Room. (Josh begins to climb the stairs) He was with the congressman ... (he stops on the stairs and turns to face her) ... and Barry Goodwin and Senator Montgomery. It looked pretty intense. (beat) Illinois? (the look on Josh's face says it all) I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.
(Josh gives her a troubled look, then climbs the rest of the stairs and heads off in search of Leo)

Many thanks to The West Wing Collection for the wonderful screencaps!