JOSH: I lost my binder for National Strategies.
DONNA: The blue one?
JOSH: The black one, with the secret launch codes.
DONNA: It'll turn up.
JOSH: I also need the Cabinet Affairs Amplification Report and if you can get the AP Farm Guide back online, I'm almost sure Toby gave me a punchier quote on Ag reorganization.
DONNA: I shall do those things.
JOSH: You "shall"?
DONNA: I shall. And I'll tell you what I'd like in exchange.
JOSH: How about a weekly salary of some kind?
DONNA: Yes, plus a favour.
JOSH: Name it.
DONNA: It's a big favour.
JOSH: What do you need?
DONNA: I had a English teacher in the twelfth grade named Molly Morello, and she was one of those teachers, and she's retiring.
JOSH: For me, it was Mr. Fyke for American History AP and ComLaw.
DONNA: Right. Unusual as it may seem, we're talking about me.
JOSH: And the big favour you want?
DONNA: All right. Tell me about Mr. Fyke.
JOSH: No, I think that moment's done, except to say that he meant the world to me and he died four years ago.
DONNA: Okay, well, Mrs. Morello is retiring--
JOSH: Not quite as bad as dying.
DONNA: How hard is it to get a Presidential proclamation?
JOSH: Molly Morello Day?
DONNA: I was hoping for Molly Morello month, but I should be realistic.
DONNA: And that would be Molly Morello Day?
JOSH: That would be a nice letter from the principal.
DONNA: Oh, come on. Get him to sign a piece of paper. A little proclamation.
JOSH: A little piece of paper? Proclamations have the full force of law behind them. The Emancipation Proclamation, to name just one.
DONNA: To name the only one.
JOSH: Listen, I don't know what's involved with these things. They probably have advisory boards, commissions ... the NATO Commander is involved, possibly.
DONNA: Can I find out what's involved?
JOSH: Yeah. But find me the blue notebook first.
JOSH: I'm going to the meeting now.
JOSH: Did I leave a folder called Southeast Targets and ... (Donna hands it to him) Thank you.
DONNA: I've been putting together a folder of my own--all the things that need to be done in order for the President to issue a proclamation.
JOSH: What has to be done?
DONNA: Let me check. Nothing.
DONNA: Nothing has to be done.
JOSH: He can't just issue a proclamation.
DONNA: He can.
JOSH: No, I'm saying he can't just because you want him to. What's next--executive clemency if you're having a bad hair day?
DONNA: I never have a bad hair day, and Molly Morello was a public school teacher for 41 years.
JOSH: Which is nice, but these things are for important causes, not individual perqs for staffers--
DONNA: National Digestive Diseases Awareness Week.
JOSH: When was that?
DONNA: Right now. It began after General Polaski Memorial Day
JOSH: Look, if you're going to mock the dead--
DONNA: February was National Sewing Month, by the way.
JOSH: It's still the President's name and reputation. We haven't vetted this woman.
DONNA: You're saying what if she's a lesbian?
JOSH: If she were a lesbian, we could talk. I'm saying, what if she's a bicycle thief?
DONNA: I doubt it--
JOSH: Don't doubt it, know it. Do a Google search, then talk to me.
DONNA: Clean as a whistle.
JOSH: Thank you.
DONNA: Molly Morello.
DONNA: When was the last time I asked you for anything? (he doesn't answer) By the way, I found this.
DONNA: A proclamation to modify the quantitative limitations applicable to the imports of wheat gluten.
JOSH: We are just a little Rococco, aren't we?
DONNA: Why is Molly Morello less worthy of a proclamation than General Polaski?
JOSH: I wish I knew who General Polaski was.
DONNA: This is what I mean!
JOSH: She's not less worthy, but neither is she more worthy than the 90,000 other public school teachers who are retiring this year.
DONNA: Who weren't lucky enough to have a White House staffer as a former student.
JOSH: But that's where we get into trouble.
DONNA: Who would find out?
JOSH: Who would find out is also where we frequently find trouble.
DONNA: You're right.
DONNA: All right, you're right.
DONNA: Good evening, Mr President.
BARTLET: Tell Josh that General Polaski was a Polish Brigadier General who vanquished the Russian and Prussian military, then came to the colonies and commanded our cavalry during the American Revolution.
DONNA: I will, Sir.
BARTLET: It says here in a briefing paper hastily written by Deputy Josh Lyman that in the '60s, when the Madison Superintendent of Schools banned Twelfth Night for reasons passing understanding, a Mrs Molly Morello had students over to her house on Saturdays to read it.
DONNA: I didn't know that, Sir. (beat) Josh wrote you a memo on Molly Morello?
BARTLET: Yeah, because all I had tonight was a nuclear spill in Idaho.