A Proportional Response (Episode 103)
First Aired: Wednesday, 6th October, 1999
Writer: Aaron Sorkin
Director: Marc Buckland

I Need A Raise
Corridors of The West Wing / Bullpen. Josh and Donna walk and talk.

DONNA: CJ's looking for you.
JOSH: Huh?
DONNA: CJ's looking for you.
JOSH: Donna?
JOSH: "Good morning, Josh" is a pretty good way to start the day.
DONNA: Good morning.
JOSH: What's up?
DONNA: CJ's looking for you.
JOSH: Tell her I'm in the office.
DONNA: Josh, I'm saying, CJ is looking for you.
JOSH: What did I do?
DONNA: How would I know?
JOSH: Because you know everything.
DONNA: I do know everything.
JOSH: Donna ...
DONNA: I'm saying, you say that now, but everytime I want to make a substantive contribution--
JOSH: You make plenty of substantive contributions.
DONNA: Like what?
JOSH: This! This could be a substantive contribution.
DONNA: I need a raise.
JOSH: So do I!
DONNA: You're my boss.
JOSH: True, but I'm not the one who pays you.
DONNA: Yeah, but you could recommend that I get a raise.
JOSH: Donna, she's looking for me. Do you really think this is the best time to talk about a raise?
DONNA: I think this is the best time to talk about a raise.
JOSH: Donna, you're not a very nice person.
DONNA: You got to get to know me.
JOSH: Donna ...
DONNA: The best I can cobble together from the small shards of information I've been able to overhear in the restroom and the danish cart--
JOSH: Donna ...
DONNA: Is it possible that there's a situation involving Sam, a woman, and CJ being denied information about something?
JOSH: (beat) Okay, here's what I'm gonna do--
DONNA: Hide in your office?
JOSH: No. I'm not going to hide in my office. I'm going to go into my office and devise a strategy. That is what I do. I'm a professional. I'm not a little boy.
DONNA: That's the spirit.
JOSH: But if she calls, I'm at the dentist. I'll be back in an hour.
DONNA: Got it.

You Can Kiss That Raise Goodbye
Josh's office. Donna walks in, to find CJ and Josh there.

DONNA: Wait, she was here?
CJ: Could you excuse us, Donna?
DONNA: How did I miss that?
JOSH: I don't know, but you can kiss that raise goodbye.
DONNA: Senior Staff in five minutes.
JOSH: Thanks.

If You Were To Run Across A Sandwich, Then Hang The Expense
Roosevelt Room. Charlie waits to be interviewed as Josh and Donna approach from down the hall.

JOSH: I haven't eaten lunch yet, if anyone's going to the thing.
DONNA: What do you want?
JOSH: I would like a salad, I would like a soup of some kind and if you were to run across a sandwich, then hang the expense.
DONNA: Right.
JOSH: And I would like a bottle of water.
DONNA: This is Charles Young.
(Donna leaves. Josh calls down the hall after her)
JOSH: Donna!
DONNA: What?
JOSH: Never mind the salad, I'm not going to eat it anyway.
DONNA: Fine.
JOSH: But I would like a bottle of water as soon as humanly possible.
DONNA: Fine!

Roosevelt Room. Josh continues to interview Charlie as Donna enters with a bottle of water for Josh.

DONNA: Water.
CHARLIE: See, that's not--see, there's been some kind of mistake ...
JOSH: (scanning a document) I'll say ... Donna!
CHARLIE: I should go.
JOSH: "Insuccessful"?
DONNA: What's the problem?
JOSH: I don't think we're allowed to make up our own words.
DONNA: Oh, and like there's no chance it's a typo.
JOSH: Change it, would you? Serious people are going to read that.

The Second Time I Didn't Care That Much
Bullpen. Josh and Donna talk at her desk.

JOSH: Where's Charlie?
DONNA: He's filling out his employment stuff in personnel.
JOSH: How's he doing?
DONNA: He looked pretty freaked.
JOSH: He's a gamer--I can pick 'em.
DONNA: If you say so.
JOSH: (beat) I've got nothing to do.
DONNA: I can see that.
JOSH: Everyone's running around like the future of the world depends on it--which, I suppose, it does--everyone's running around, working. Me, I've got nothing to do.
JOSH: I'm like a writer on a movie set.
DONNA: Have you ever been on a movie set?
JOSH: No, but I hear stories.
DONNA: You want to do mail?
JOSH: I suppose there's some comfort in knowing that whatever's going to happen today has already happened.
MANDY: (coming out of Josh's office) Josh, your office sucks.
JOSH: I don't understand it -- why can't you tell me when there's someone in my office?
DONNA: The first time I didnt know. The second time I didn't care that much.

Many thanks to the now-defunct Foggy Bottom for the wonderful screencaps!