Noel (Episode 210)
First Aired: Wednesday, 20th December, 2000
Teleplay: Aaron Sorkin
Story: Peter Parnell
Director: Thomas Schlamme











Don't Be A Yutz
Bullpen / Corridors of the West Wing. Josh and Donna walk and talk.

JOSH: Donna!
DONNA: I have the personnel file for the pilot.
JOSH: How did you know I was going to ask you for that?
DONNA: I'm tuned to you.
JOSH: Seriously.
DONNA: I anticipate your every need.
JOSH: Yeah, but to be walking by with the guy's personnel file?
DONNA: They called me ten minutes ago, Josh--don't be a yutz.
JOSH: Oh.
DONNA: On the other hand ... you're a very handsome man.
JOSH: What do you need.
DONNA: You're a very powerful and a very handsome man.
JOSH: What do you need?
DONNA: You know how I never ask you for anything?
JOSH: What do you need!
DONNA: Yo-Yo Ma is playing at the Christmas party.
JOSH: Which one?
DONNA: Congressional.
JOSH: Fine.
DONNA: I can come?
JOSH: Give me the file.
DONNA: Can I come?
JOSH: To the Congressional Christmas party?
DONNA: Yeah.
JOSH: Yeah.
DONNA: You can take your Pablo Casals, you can keep your Rostopovich--I say Yo-Yo Ma rules.
JOSH: (reads the personnel file) Hmmm ...
DONNA: What?
JOSH: This guy--the pilot?
DONNA: What about him?
JOSH: He's got the same birthday as me. (beat) I'll be in here.








It's Like A Damn Hockey Game Out Here!
Bullpen. Josh comes out of his office, clearly agitated and shouting.

JOSH: Would it be possible to hold the noise down out here?
DONNA: Do you need something?
JOSH: I need the CBO spec.
DONNA: It's on your desk.
JOSH: It's like a damn hockey game out here!








Yo-Yo Ma Rules!
Bullpen / meeting room. Josh remembers things as he meets with Stanley.

DONNA: Yo-Yo Ma rules!
(cut to meeting room with Stanley)
JOSH: She wouldn't shut up about Yo-Yo Ma.
STANLEY: You don't like the cello?
JOSH: I like the cello fine. You asked me what was going on that day and one of the things that was going on was that Donna wouldn't shut up about Yo-Yo Ma.
STANLEY: Who was playing at the Christmas Party.
JOSH: Yeah.








As Long As I Got A Job, You Got A Job
West Wing lobby, Christmas Eve. Josh enters to find Leo sitting in a chair.

LEO: How'd it go?
JOSH: Did you wait around for me? (beat) He thinks I may have an eating disorder.
LEO: Josh--
JOSH: And a fear of rectangles. That's not weird, is it? (beat) I didn't cut my hand on a glass. I broke a window in my apartment.
LEO: This guy's walking down the street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can't get out. A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, "Hey, can you help me out?" The doctor writes him a prescription, throws it down the hole, and moves on. Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, "Father, I'm down in this hole--can you help me out?" The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole, and moves on. Then a friend walks by. "Hey Joe, it's me--can you help me out?" And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, "Are you stupid? Now we're both down here!" And the friend says, "Yeah, but I've been down here before, and I know the way out." (beat) As long as I got a job, you got a job--you understand? (motions to Josh's bandaged hand) You wrapped that yourself, right?
JOSH: The bandage?
LEO: Yeah.
JOSH: Yeah.
LEO: Donna's gonna take you to the emergency room.
JOSH: She knows?
LEO: She was the one who guessed.
JOSH: I don't need the emergency room.
LEO: Come on, it could be infected--you could have a thing.
JOSH: What thing?
LEO: How the hell do I know?
JOSH: Leo--
(Donna approaches them)
DONNA: (helps Josh on with his coat) Let's go.
JOSH: See you later.
LEO: Okay.









Are You A Doctor?
Exterior White House, Christmas Eve. Josh and Donna exit through the front gate, where a group of carollers sing 'Carol of the Bells' while ringing brass bells

JOSH: I don't need a doctor.
DONNA: Are you a doctor?
JOSH: No.
DONNA: Then be quiet. (Josh stares at the carollers, lost in thought) Josh?
JOSH: Yeah.
DONNA: (softly) Let's go.
JOSH: Okay.




Many thanks to The West Wing Collection for the wonderful screencaps!