The Dogs of War (Episode 502)
First Aired: Wednesday, 1st October, 2003
Writer: John Wells
Director: Christopher Misiano

There's A Guy In My Office
Bullpen / Josh's office. Josh enters after the news conference announcing the U.S. bombing of Qumar.

JOSH: You see?
DONNA: Yeah, I saw. You have 132 phone messages.
JOSH: Half of them want me to switch my long-distance carrier.
DONNA: There'd be at least as faxes many if we had a fax.
JOSH: We don't have a fax?
DONNA: The FBI boosted it for evidence.
JOSH: Okay, so we're not going to return all those. See if Leo's around, would you?
(Josh goes into his office to find a man in his early 20s sitting in his visitor's chair)
(Josh looks at him strangely, then goes back out to the bullpen)
JOSH: There's a guy in my office.
DONNA: That's Ryan. Says he works for you. Did you forget to tell me something?
JOSH: He says he works for me?
DONNA: That's what his pass says, too. (into the phone) Hi, it's Donna Moss ...
(Josh goes back into his office)
JOSH: Hi. Josh Lyman. (he proffers his hand and they shake)
RYAN: Ryan Pierce. I didn't know if I should come in, what with everything that's going on.
JOSH: Yeah, it's been pretty crazy here--
RYAN: I figured if there was a problem, somebody would have called, or--
JOSH: Okay, who are you?
RYAN: Ryan Pierce?
JOSH: No, I got that part. I mean, who are you?
RYAN: Leo didn't tell you?
JOSH: Leo McGarry? Wait here.
(Josh goes back out to the bullpen)
DONNA: Leo's in his office. Am I being passed over?
JOSH: What?
DONNA: If you're going to bring someone in over me, you could at least have the common courtesy--
JOSH: I don't even know who that guy is!

I Had A Lot Of Girlfriends
Josh's Office / Bullpen / Corridors of the West Wing. Josh tries to focus on work and a bored Ryan sits in his visitor's chair as Donna enters.

DONNA: Josh. (she drops a thick file folder on his desk) Vetting files on the ...
RYAN: My Dad went there (Harvard), too ... my sister ... my uncle Bunky ...
DONNA: Uncle Bunky?
RYAN: Yeah. Ridiculous, huh?
(CJ enters holding a piece of paper which she passes to Josh)
CJ: Atwood gave a quote to the Times.
DONNA: You're a Pierce? Pierce bedroom in the Residence ... that's you?
RYAN: My great-great-grandfather.
JOSH: Has Toby seen this?
CJ: I found you first.
(CJ leaves, and Josh sighs and gets up, Donna and Ryan hot on his heels)
DONNA: What's it say? (Josh passes it to her and they keep walking)
RYAN: Hey, do you know Elliot Cabot? He would have been there around your time.
JOSH: No, I don't think so.
RYAN: I knew his little sister Perry. Pretty well, in fact.
JOSH: Yeah, I bet you did.
RYAN: You know Hamilton Pugh? Ham Pugh?
DONNA: I don't get it. (she passes the piece of paper back to Josh as they reach the Communications Bullpen)
JOSH: Where's Toby?
BONNIE: (offscreen) He went down to the Mess.
RYAN: Ham's squash team went 9-and-0 in '89. All-Ivy three years in a row.
JOSH: I wasn't much into squash. I was more of a Crimson guy.
DONNA: Crimson?
JOSH: The campus newspaper.
RYAN: Yeah, that figures.
JOSH: What's that supposed to mean?
RYAN: Nothing--that's great.
JOSH: Are you implying I didn't have a social life?
RYAN: You said you had a girlfriend--
JOSH: I had a lot of girlfriends.
DONNA: Really?
RYAN: You guys always walk so fast?
(just then he trips and falls, and Josh and Donna peer down at him in unison)
JOSH: Yes.

The President Hasn't Decided
Josh's office / Bullpen. Josh mulls over Vice-Presidential candidates on a bulletin board when Steve, from Walken's camp, drops by.

STEVE: So who's the lucky winner?
JOSH: The President hasn't decided.
STEVE: You got a favourite?
JOSH: The President hasn't decided.
DONNA: Josh, they're gathering.
STEVE: Nice office.
(Steve leaves, and after another minute of staring at the bulletin board, so does Josh. He walks out of his office and turns to enter the bullpen, to find Donna standing in the bullpen doorway. They stare at each other for a moment, smiling with relief, then Josh turns to leave for the Oval Office).

Many thanks to Misdirection for the wonderful screencaps!

For fan fiction relating to this episode, visit Those Stories, a Josh and Donna post-episode fiction archive.

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