JOSH: There are some new people.
DONNA: Cabinet Affairs installed some temps so you'd have extra staff during the vetting period.
JOSH: Which is good.
JOSH: I'm not one to give fashion advice--
DONNA: No, you're not.
JOSH: But one of them-- (he frowns at her)
JOSH: One of them is wearing a ... a ... uh, a Star Trek pin. Is today a special Star Trek holiday or something?
DONNA: How the hell would I know?
JOSH: Okay ... well, then, would you find out? And if it's not, you know, people walk through here and it's not the most confidence-inspiring sight to see in a White House employee, so if you could ask her to--
DONNA: It's a her?
JOSH: Yeah. I have my briefing memo? (she passes it to him) Thank you.
DONNA: Hang on! I'm doing you a favour, now you have to do me one.
JOSH: You're almost there but you're not quite getting it. When it's something you're paid to do, that's not a favour. But what do you got?
DONNA: Nancy McNally has a new military aide named Jack Reese. And we've talked a few times, and I want you to ask him if he likes me.
JOSH: Wow. I'm definitely not going to do that.
DONNA: How many girls have I gotten for you?
JOSH: Aren't these basically women who come up to you and say, "Is that Josh Lyman"?
JOSH: And you've said?
DONNA: Yes, every time.
JOSH: Well, I'll properly ID you for him, no problem.
DONNA: Just a little bit. All you have to do is introduce yourself and remind him in some way that I work for you and see if he says anything.
JOSH: I can't, Potsie--Ralph and I are double-dating with the Drubruski twins.
DONNA: I am asking for something very little and you know--you know how lame I am with this.
JOSH: That's true.
DONNA: That was for the fashion?
DONNA: You'll do it?
(they reach the Lobby, where Amy is signing the visitors' registry)
JOSH: Hey, what are you doing here?
DONNA: (to Amy) Hey. (to Josh) She's got an appointment with you right after Senior Staff. (to Amy again) We're running about 15 minutes behind.
AMY: At 10 o'clock? That's like a half-hour ahead.
DONNA: I know. We're very proud.
JOSH: What's the meeting about?
DONNA: Will you do it?
JOSH: Okay. I'm going to see Fitzwallace.
JOSH: Hey, I see she's not wearing the pin anymore. Thanks.
DONNA: She was kind of worked up about it.
DONNA: I don't know.
JOSH: All right. Hang on. (he goes over to a desk where a red-headed woman sits) Hi. I'm Josh Lyman.
JANICE: Janice Trumble.
JOSH: Yeah. The reason why I wanted you to take off the pin is ... just around the White House, you understand.
JANICE: I'm appealing your request to Stacey.
JOSH: I'm sorry?
JANICE: My supervisor is Stacey.
JOSH: Right, except Stacey works for me.
JANICE: Okay, well, you got the cards. But Star Trek and the entire Starfleet series is about honour and loyalty and civic duty, and the fact that you don't think those are characteristics that should be displayed inside the White House is sad. But I wouldn't expect you to understand those kinds of things. Anything else?
JOSH: No. (he walks back over to Donna)
DONNA: See what I mean?
JOSH: Shhh! Shhh! Shhh!
JOSH: She is, well, one of the special people.
JOSH: She's taken off the pin, we're going to let it be.
DONNA: I'm assuming you haven't talked to him yet?
JOSH: That's right. What do you think about this Vicki Hilton problem?
DONNA: I think you know what I think.
JOSH: No, I mean about whether it's right for the White House to be involved.
DONNA: Mmm ... that's a harder question. I've been thinking about it, and I--
(they reach the Roosevelt Room, where Josh's meeting with Fitzwallace is)
JOSH: You've got to go faster next time. I'm already here.
JOSH: Hi. I'm Josh Lyman, we just met in there.
JOSH: This conversation you and I are having right now, it was not my idea to have it--this must be distinctly understood.
JACK: Is anything wrong?
JOSH: You've met my assistant, Donna?
JACK: Yeah! She was standing outside when I went to vote. She wanted to trade with a Ritchie voter because she filled out her ballot wrong, and I thought it was ... kind of cool.
JOSH: (as Josh continues to speak, Jack looks more and more confused) Well, if you liked that, she nearly got arrested once when she got her arm stuck in a mailbox trying to retrieve a letter she wrote to Ilie Nastase, she once left her underpants at an art opening, and after a summit in Belarus, she tried to smuggle 11 scented mince candles into an overnight bag. They evacutated the terminal.
JACK: O-kay ... (beat) Was there something I could do for you?
JOSH: Nah. (he smiles and sniffs dismissively)
JACK: Okay. Good meeting you.
JOSH: You too. (smirking, Josh slaps Jack on the back and clears his throat, then cockily swaggers through the doorway where Donna approaches him)
JOSH: Perfect timing.
JOSH: I just talked to him.
JOSH: I think I did well, I think I fanned the flames.
DONNA: Does he want to go out?
JOSH: I think he does.
DONNA: What did he say?
JOSH: He said he thought it was cool that you were looking for someone to trade votes.
DONNA: And what did you say?
JOSH: I told him there are plenty more where that came from.
DONNA: What do you mean?
JOSH: I told him about Ilie Nastase.
JOSH: What do you mean?
DONNA: Why did you tell him that?
JOSH: I thought it went with the vote swapping theme.
DONNA: No, it goes with the crazy theme--what else did you tell him?
JOSH: The scented mince candles.
DONNA: (horrified whisper) Josh!
JOSH: These are endearing stories.
DONNA: If you know me! If you know me well! If you already like me! These are not stories, for instance, I would have told you when I was trying to get the job.
JOSH: When you were trying to get the job, you were pretending that you'd already gotten the job, so it's not like your underwear at an art gallery was going to change my mind.
DONNA: You told him about the underwear?
DONNA: Karen Cahill had me flummoxed! Did you tell him I was flummoxed?
JOSH: I think the underwear on the floor speaks for itself.
DONNA: You have to go back.
DONNA: Because he's going to think I'm flakey!
JOSH: Maybe, but he's not going to care.
JOSH: Guys will go out with anybody.
DONNA: That hasn't beem my experience! Go back!
JOSH: I am not going to--
DONNA: I have done many humiliating things for you!
JOSH: Okay. I'm going to work for a while on making peoples' lives better.
DONNA: How long is that going to ta--(he closes the door in her face)--take?
JOSH: Listen, it occurs to me that, uh ... you know I mentioned Donna before, and it occurs to me that I told you--that I--I named some things that tickled me. (Jack smiles) I--I don't know, I certainly wouldn't want to leave you with the impression that she was ... you know. Anyway, if you want to ask her out, she'd probably say yes.
JACK: Hey ... Josh, uh ...I'm new here and ... I want to do well, and, uh, I don't want to get in between anything.
JOSH: (puzzled) In between anything?
JACK: I have an aide who, in my life, I haven't talked about as much as you've talked about Donna in our entire relationship--yours and mine. Which is a cumulative total of seven minutes old.
JOSH: No, no, no.
JACK: You sure?
JOSH: Sure--tell me your aide's name. I'll ask her out, we'll double.
JACK: Chief Petty Officer Harold Wendell.
JOSH: Well, I got the fuzzy end of that lollipop.
JACK: I don't know. Wendell's not cute cute, but he's so funny.
JOSH: So, that's it. We're done talking about Donna. Whose full name is Donnatella, by the way. Her mom's Italian, dad's Irish. Okay ... thanks.
(he leaves, and Jack sits at his desk, amused but not quite sure what to make of it all)
JOSH: Hey. I think he's going to call you.
DONNA: He already did. Thank you, thank you. He asked me to have a drink tonight, and I'd really love to go home and shower and change. The two CBO reports are right on your desk, as is the East Asia paper, your call sheet is clear, if there's anything else, I'm happy to come in early tomorrow ... do you think I could go?
JOSH: What time is it?
DONNA: Quarter to eight.
DONNA: Thanks. I really like him.
JOSH: Have a good time. (beat) Those are good stories about you, though. Those stories would make me like you.
DONNA: (idly reading over a piece of paper, she totally misses the look on his face) You like everybody.
JOSH: (beat) Tomorrow's Thanksgiving.
JOSH: I meant you won't be coming in early tomorrow--you won't be coming in at all.
DONNA: Is there anything you need?
JOSH: No. I'm just ... saying.
DONNA: Okay. (she calls over her shoulder as she leaves) Happy Thanksgiving!
JOSH: You too.
(he walks down the Bullpen, lost in thought, his eyes still trailing her)