Abu El Banat (Episode 509)
First Aired: Wednesday, 3rd December, 2003
Writer: Debora Chan
Director: Lesli Linka Glatter

Why Does A Five-Year-Old Want To Meet The Three Tenors?
Corridors of the West Wing. Donna approaches Josh and CJ and they walk and talk.

DONNA: Oh, good.
JOSH: (to Donna) Talk to Debbie, we need a sit down for Congressman Donald Richter today, and get him on the phone.
DONNA: Doug Westin's in your office.
CJ: Liz's Doug?
JOSH: How come he's not with his in-laws?
DONNA: The President's introducing Gus to the Three Tenors. Hallelujah Chorus in the Blue Room.
JOSH: Why does a five-year-old want to meet the Three Tenors?
DONNA: I'm pretty sure he doesn't.
CJ: (mockingly) Doug's your friend!
JOSH: (laughing a little) He's a perfectly nice guy.
CJ: Speak slowly, you don't want to lose him.
(they cross over into the Bullpen, where maintenance workers are stringing up holiday decorations)
JOSH: Check it out! They're decking the halls!
DONNA: Five minutes and I'll spring you.

Who's In Charge Of Shopping?
Bullpen / Corridors of the West Wing. Josh and Donna discuss holiday gift-buying for his relations.

DONNA: It's important that you look at the catalogues before the end of the day.
JOSH: It's three weeks away!
DONNA: Hanukkah's two.
JOSH: That's plenty of time.
DONNA: Who's in charge of shopping?
JOSH: You are.
DONNA: The pages are turned down with Post-Its to tell you which of your relatives the gifts are for. If you're happy with the choice, you should initial at the X. If you're not happy with the choice, you should remember how this goes when you try to do it yourself.
JOSH: I like the polar fleece stuff.
DONNA: Who's in charge of shopping?
JOSH: You are.
ZOEY: Hey.
JOSH: Hey!
JOSH: Zoey--wow! You look fantastic.
ZOEY: Thanks.
DONNA: Gosh, it's great to see you back.
ZOEY: (smiles) It's good to be back!
JOSH: Wow, she looks great.

Live With The Pain
Josh's office.

DONNA: You going to come watch? There's people singing in the Lobby.
JOSH: Spontaneously?
DONNA: The choir from the tree-lighting.
JOSH: (he shows her the catalogue she gave him earlier, tapping on a Post-It) Who's that for? (she studiously ignores him) You picked your own gift?
DONNA: (sulky) I'm in charge of shopping.
JOSH: (grinning broadly) I got your gift.
DONNA: No, you didn't. Three weeks in advance?
JOSH: I saw it on Thanksgiving. I got it.
DONNA: No you didn't--what is it?
JOSH: I'm not telling you.
DONNA: I want to know.
JOSH: Really? (she smiles at him expectantly) It's a gift certificate. (her smile drops a little) Tower Records. (her smile practically vanishes) Because you're a fan of the music. You get to go on a spree.
DONNA: (trying to convince herself) That'll be fun ...
JOSH: Sometime tomorrow, I need to sit with Approps and find some foreign aid money we can reprogram.
DONNA: What should I tell them it's for?
JOSH: Bribing a dictator to get illegal missionaries out of Sudan.
DONNA: Something I can put on the memo.
JOSH: Reassigning funds from extant authorisations based on new priorities in East Africa.
DONNA: Do you mind if I go watch the carollers? (he shakes his head)
JOSH: Donna. (she turns around) It's not a gift certificate.
DONNA: (grinning) What is it?
JOSH: I'm not telling you.
DONNA: I want to know.
JOSH: Socks.
DONNA: Stop.
JOSH: I'm not telling you. Live with the pain.
(she exits, with a backwards glance and a flirtatious little grin)

Many thanks to Misdirection for the wonderful screencaps!

For fan fiction relating to this episode, visit Those Stories, a Josh and Donna post-episode fiction archive.

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